I DARE YOU

So today was one of the sadder days of the month and I know I will learn how to get over it. Still the emotions run deep with this one because there were a lot of people I like that were involved. I feel like, I of all people shouldn't have made this mistake.

I guess it is okay, they say, we learn but I think this is an accumulation of a lot of other things. Basically, I am losing focus and I don't know how to get back up. And I am scared I won't. Of course, I will still need to move on with life. I can only pray for strength.

Gym is a great place. I felt so angry with myself today and I ran and boxed it off. I am glad I found exercise and there, I meet positive people. I never do enough of it last time but it really helps release sorrow, in a way. And I heard this track in the gym today (although my coach off the speakers halfway through the workout), but I love it. It is relaxing and it reminds us to take a bold step in life. 

Matthew Koma does have some very interesting sound to offer. I am a huge fan of "Find You", the soundtrack from Divergent that gave the one good thing to remember. But this new one from him is another level of awesome. I love the deep meaning constructed within the electronic DJ beats. A party song that well, is not just for body moving but also to be appreciated. 

We're a million lonely people

All together on this needle in the sky

Afraid of heights

And your dreams were made illegal

By the laws of lesser evils we call life

But not tonight

I love how he describes us human as being afraid to things because whatever we dream is deemed impossible by the boundaries of laws and life. We are all standing in up there on this thin needle but we are afraid to jump to free ourselves because we are scared. And sometimes, we just want to break free and do things that are beyond reasons. That is the freedom that the song wants us to achieve. 

I dare you to love

I dare you to cry

I dare you to run

I dare you to try

I dare you to fall

And lay on the ground

I dare you to feel

I dare you to be here now

Of all the things above, I am scared of almost all of it.

I have never dared to love anyone with all my heart because I am afraid of getting hurt. I guess I used to be afraid of crying as I see it as a sign of weakness, but not anymore. Running I used to hate but now, I kind of enjoy it. Trying too I am afraid, I never do what I am not confident of succeeding and falling of course, is something I am most afraid of. Most part, I am worried I can never get back up again.

But a good thing is I think I am learning to conquer it all. I am trying my best to start accepting love and feel love without expectations. I am more understanding of my tears, accepting it as strength and a mode of relief. Sometimes I wish I could cry more. Now when I see people cry, I am happy for them because I know they must have held back for so long their sorrow. To try something new is something I am still very skeptical of but I guess, one day I should be able to take a leap of faith.

You're an outline of a vision 

That you had when we were children yesterday

You watched it fade

Let your heart be your religion

Let it break you out of this prison you became

It's not too late

My favourite verse because I love how he describe our ideals as children but as we grow older we began to fear things or lose faith. When we are young, we believe everything is possible but adulthood makes us scared. So I love how he asked us to follow our heart and break out to do things that we thought we can't do. I am a true believer in following your heart and this verse tells you to do just that.

I am constantly trying to be a better person and to accept new challenges. Of course, it is easier said than done, but songs like these keep one motivated.

Here's to courage and strength to overcome all challenges and may we take the leap of faith to believe and get out of our comfort zone.