I WILL JUST FOLLOW JUST BECAUSE IT MAKES ME HAPPIER

The less you give a damn, the happier you'll be...

I've decided to adopt this philosophy.

I cared so much about something and I get stressed up over it - and towards the end, I what do I get?

Disappointment and self-doubt.

I've realised that sometimes, I don't really need to suffer and be overly stressed out by the need to be on top of things.

Especially when others don't care.

Think about it. I have nothing to lose because at the end of the day, I tried, I did give my best, and if my best is not good enough, I'm sorry I just need to move on (with a few fake smiles and a lot of patience sometimes).

There are a lot of subjective things surrounding us and ideas and comments that bring you down perhaps don't matter.

At the end, I only have one life and eventually, I'll die.

And when I die, I'd realise that, none of this matter. Because it wasn't a sinful action - just a matter of disagreement.

No one is to say I was wrong, or that you are incorrect, it was just a matter of opinion. 

And I am just tired of trying to consolidate varying ones.

It dilapitates me (even till this day) when things that I find awesome, doesn't have the same impact on others.

And I'm really trying to - yes, not give a damn.

My brother said this, which opened up my mind.

'If there are people who doesn't get the idea behind your idea/creativity, by all means, follow their way because this is just not the time for you to shine. So move on." 

Agree - but my problem is I get stuck - stuck with no ideas on how to do it another way and stuck with the fact that what I thought is brilliant, is not that brilliant.

Everyone is entitled to their opinions - and at this phase of my life, I've realised that to be happy, sometimes, you just need to be a good dog. Because instead of trying so hard to get people to get you, it is actually better for you health and mind to do it their way. Just follow and wait for the right moment to shine.

And if still unappreciated, move on...will need to find the one who can see the sparks instead.

Sometimes, it is tiring.

It could be my problem - I try too hard to please everyone and I can't.

The best way is to shut up and smile. 

The damn you give should always have a limit.

Note to self: Ideas don't come when you are stressed anyway. 

And remember, you will die one day - so all these are temporary and don't matter! 

Until I find the fire to fight again...right now, I'll be mellow like a marshmellow (does that make sense?)